Anonymous asked: i can't believe your actually into chicks. Its hot but why do settle for getting fingered when you can get the real thing?
I know, right?!? That time when I was 19 and that girl gave me five orgasms in the span of a couple hours I was so confused! I mean.. it felt real. All the signs were there, head rush, body tingles, loss of breath, warmth - so much warmth, exhaustion, elation..just, everything I had come to know an orgasm to be! When I finally came around after feeling like I blacked out, panic struck! I looked around, under the blankets, the pillows, the bed.. and to my confusion -no penis!
My friend asked me what I was looking for, “The Real Thing!!” I screamed! I was sure it had to be somewhere, surely I couldn’t have just experienced such pleasure with The Fake Thing(s).
I tore my room apart, searched every nook and cranny with no luck. But there was one place I hadn’t checked. I looked to my friend, she lay there on the bed, confused and pretty irritated if I’m being honest. Could it be?? Was she hiding it? I had to find out.
I embarked on my search with gusto. Thoroughly exploring any possible place The Real Thing could have gone. Much to my surprise, the harder I looked, the deeper I went the more she seemed to be enjoying herself! In fact, I dare say she had an orgasm or two herself.
Much later when I’d been pushed away and told “No more.” I collapsed on my bed in confusion. She hadn’t been hiding the thing. I stared at my hand and contemplated what had just happened. Could it be?? Could these fingers be The Real Thing? It didn’t make sense - they didn’t look like a penis! I couldn’t be sure, so I promised myself from that day forward I would devote myself to figuring out this great mystery.
It’s been some time since that fateful night, and I’ve yet to find the answers. I have however, found plenty of orgasms. I will continue to “settle” for the good of humanity and report back with any new findings.
I love this because it can be a girl refusing to shave her legs or a boy in a dress. Either way they’re saying “fuck you” to gender norms and standards of appearance.
Reblogging again for the commentary.
I have 99 problems and not being in Middle Earth is all of them
RIP: Actor Peter Falk, best remembered for his roles as TV’s Columbo and the grandfather/narrator from The Princess Bride, passed away last night in his Beverly Hills home.
He was 83.
Cause of death has not been released, but his adopted daughter Catherine reported that the actor was suffering from dementia and Alzheimer’s disease.
Aw, ew… what the fuck
I got a new kitten - Trike.
Anonymous asked: I love you.